Wow

Today we were posted in the newspaper and I am at a loss to describe the craziness that ensued.  I am amazed with Liz who contacted the papers on our behalf.  The newspaper jumped on in monday morning and had the story posted online by monday night.  I woke up today and saw our picture on the front page.  I must say I am very appreciative and even more nervous. I actually hunkered down and hid out of sight today.  Luckily, I had excuses such as our first meeting for our teens with tots.  The outpouring of support is amazing-our vet gave us a credit, one church gave us gift cards for food, another called to send a donation, toilets and tools, toys and clothing all donated.  Furniture to the teens from the pastor at Grace Bible.  Dr. Summer Khan's support in helping our teen mothers and the items donated.  So many are stepping forward.  My dad did work for two people today and gave them the article to donate to. Another contacted the paper to do a public interest story of how we impacted their life.  I see so many paying it forward that my heart beams.  I was unprepared for this and hate the late hours it involves.  Selfishly I was so looking forward to having a break after two years with my masters.  Hopefully in the next few days, the pressure and amount of work with taper off and I will get to bed before the wee hours of the morning.  I am trying to do this gracefully, but really, I hate the limelight. I am having such a difficult time with the words of praise.  I am a mere instrument of God's and it is He who deserves the praise.  My stomach constantly turns and I have to remind myself that this is where God wants me right now.
I must apology for the direction my blog has taken.  I realize what started out as a journey through Alzheimer's has become much more like my diary. As I went to my mother's tonight, I talked with her about helping me with the blog, sharing what it feels like what she thinks, and how things seem through her jagged eyes.  She was very interested in doing it and hopes that her words might give caregivers some insight into taking care of someone with Alzheimer's.  Her first tidbit of advice was don't make changes quickly and give a routine.  In a world where nothing makes sense and everything is pretty scary, knowing what happens because it is the same each day gives them some order and some clarity.  As she said "it makes things less scary and confusing.  I guess when you have to expel so much energy just trying to make sense of this new world, the last thing you want is the unexpected.  I was impressed at this insight and amazed at how clear she can be with reasoning and thoughts.  She was rather nervous tonight and I find it so hard not to get irritated when she has me get up and down to stop and start the movie so she can tell me something about beck and his compound. I hate how many times i must turn on and off the air/heat and now we have a space heater to turn on and off as well.  Maybe because I am tired, but I wish just once she could stop the overflow of information that she starts spewing out as soon as the movie begins.  I promise the entire time I am there she is calm and quiet.  As soon as I hit the play button, she wants me to count her money, go ask dad about her money, check the locks, ask me about her teeth, ask about her chest and any new lumps, try to figure out what new tv series to play with Kevin.  Each of these thoughts take about 5 to 7 minutes to get out into coherent messages and the entire time, I cannot stop thinking about the movie.  Why is it that I know I will not watch the movie fluidly, nor do I actually care to watch the movie.  For some reason, once it starts going, I hate to have it stopped.  Strange Strange Strange.  So after everything, mom finally enjoyed the last five minutes of the movie :)Ok really late just looked at the clock so off I go-Good nite everyone and once again thanks for the support.  Here is a link to the article if you feel so inclined to read it .

http://www2.highlandstoday.com/content/2010/dec/13/works-in-faith/news/