Tis the season

December 11, 2010 Photo Shoot with my mother

 

Did you miss me?  I know, preparing all that food should have freed up so much of my time and it did.  I was able to complete my schooling and I am proud to say that I am finished.  Completely and utterly finished!!! I also am proud to say that I have graduated Summa Cum Laude as of Friday.  I am so pleased with that title and know that I should not be so boastful.  I just never thought I could make straight A's.  Never once in my life did I accomplish that until now!  I guess I just was not busy enough when I was younger.  Anyway, now I can start looking for a part time job or something that can bring in some money since Jason and I stink at fundraising for Works in Faith.  The best part is we are able to live off so little that we can give the majority of our income back to the people of this community.  Like right now, we have six families that will do nothing for Christmas.  I am going to try and raise $500.00 dollars to help buy some toys and Christmas food for these families.  I am going to tug on heart strings right now and use my blog to motivate some of my readers to go to our website and donate anything they can.  Help me raise the money to give these people a good holiday.  You can even specify what family you want to help.  Family 1: single mother with one daughter that has been robbed twice in the last three months.  She has no money to even buy her prescriptions after paying all her bills.  She was a nurse but due to an accident, her doctor will not release her to go back to work.  Instead of collecting Social Security, she is enrolled in school to obtain a degree in some other field to help her go to work.  Her daughter has had some horrific things happen to her and are too personal to mention.  The house has a roof that is leaking and we cannot fix it because we do not have the resources to pay for the materials.  Family 2:  This is a family of four that often has six, seven, or eight in their home.  They are a foster family that bring all sorts of children into their home.  They recently had three little ones come into their home to celebrate the Christmas holiday and were unexpected. With the new additions, there will now be 7 children present.  With a limited budget, they already have purchased the presents for the previous four that are in the house.  These are children that have been uprooted from their home due to neglect, abuse, or both.
Family 3:  This is a mother of three children that moved here unexpectedly.  She found work within a week of moving, but due to the holiday season, was quickly unemployed again.  She is looking for work and has secured another job but will not have enough to get the children anything for Christmas.  Family 4:  This is a mother and father of a two year old.  The father recently got laid off from work because the contractor did not have work for him to do.  He is looking for a job and has yet to find one (In our county, it is very very difficult to find work right now unless you know someone as I am finding out).  Those are our top four, I will blog about the rest next week.  Please if you can give anything, I can guarantee 100% of all donations will go to the families. As it is, I am using the $200 I would get for my paycheck for the last two months to go to some of the families food needs.  Rather than buy the things I would like to get my children, I have gone to yard sales to buy their gifts and will do the same for these families.  I will stretch your money to help these families.  Consider mailing in the donation because then paypal does not get a %.  While sometimes I hate that I cannot do as I want to for my children, they are never without.  Even more amazing, is that compassion and desire my daughter has to give to others.  She goes through her clothes and toys and gives without reservation. http://www.worksinfaith.org/. 

Back to this photo shoot:  Things with my mother has been bizarre to say the least.  Last week she was a mess.  She now sits on the toilet with her pants on and shakes all the time.  She no longer has the strength to get out of the tub and I have to pick her up.  She could barely talk and would jerk her arms and legs.  Movie night was frustrating because she did not watch the movie at all but rather asked me to stop it so she could tell me something only to forget.  Then all of a sudden, the jerking, shaking, and nontalking stopped and she is the lady in the pictures above. Still unable to do much, still peeing on the toilet through her clothing, still losing her train of thought, but happy oh so happy.  And loving.  I do not think in all my years of my life my mother was as sweet and as kind as she is these last few days.  

Whatever it is, I want this to stay.  I find myself wanting to go and be with her even when i am not required.  I actually miss her and enjoy the time with her so much.  I know that my brother and father feel the same because I watch them.  My brother goes up there when he does not have to , my dad comes home early to be with her.  And I must say, I think it is because we are all in shock.  This woman is probably the best mother I have ever had even though she cannot do anything.  She can talk and boy she uses those words to encourage and uplift saying how much she loves us, how happy she is to have us, how blessed she is for all the help. She praises and gushes over us.  How can you not like that...The one thing about all this that I do not understand is her ability to grasp it all.  I wonder how many of you that have had a loved one with Alzheimer's had someone like this.  She can tell you exactly what it feels like to have Alzheimer's.  How she sits on the toilet and knows she will pee her pants and

does not want it to happen but cannot figure out what to do to stop it.  How her body is rejecting her thoughts and she cannot control her own emotions or movements.  How she hears and sees people

and has to kick them out because they are not real.  Although she admits that one or two of them she lets stay because they comfort her sometimes even though she knows they are not really there.  She will talk about everything going on and is aware of our president, our current affairs.  She cannot raise her arm on command nor brush her hair.  She cannot dress herself at all and cannot drink from a cup without a straw.  She can no longer read, write, or tell time.  How then is she able to do all this other stuff.  It seems as though her process memory is shot but not her other memories.  She is aware of how people feel about her and that is the part that bothers her the most.  Well almost the most-really what bothers 

 her the most is the way she looks.  She was soooooo vain growing up and still is.  Yesterday the reason we had the photo shoot is because I was able to do her makeup.  Yes, I know that is unbelievable-Kimberly actually put makeup on someone and it turned out nice.  I am finally learning how to be a woman-I can cut her hair, style her hair, and apply make-up.  I still cannot do it to myself but eventually in time I may.  Fortunately for me, my hubby hates me with my hair done and make up on. 

  Back to her friends.  This woman was such an amazing friend to everyone.  She took care of everyone and helped strangers.  It bothers me that now, there are literally four people that care enough to still be with her.  One is her very best friend that has been with her through thick and thin for over 25 years.  The rest.....all elderly ladies up to 90 years in age that show her more love and compassion than anyone else. 

One took her out to a restaurant yesterday.  My mother was so happy that someone other than my brother, father, or me took interest in her.  Then she got home and the 80 year old invited her over to visit.  Finally, the 90 year old woman came by just to chat with my mother.  Can anyone tell me why no other family or friends talk with her or take her out?  Why do they avoid her-because they cannot understand or accept???? Ah well...Keep Jason and I in your prayers as we are in transition looking for work.  We are also in the process of getting long term disability and insurance so I can get my testing done finally.  I have to know if I have the gene or not!!!!Now that finals are done and school is complete, I hope to blog more often!!! Please remember to donate if you can.  Christmas is about giving and often we forget about those that are not in our immediate lives.  Sometimes we grab an angel off a tree or give some money to the man ringing a bell, but we never know if we are helping someone or enabling someone.  I promise that all those we help are not being enabled.  They must  be helping themselves and contributing to bettering their lives, not just leaching off of others.  Thank you so much for everything.  Oh and for those of you that have sent the furniture for the dollhouse-I cannot thank you enough.  I will post some pictures of my daughter's face when she opens them up.  I did not mention you by name because I am unsure if you want to be public but your gift of kindness has not gone unnoticed.  I am so grateful for it!!!